About 6 months ago, at the onset of my crise de la vie , it came to me in a flash of insight that it's important to me to live an unusual life. Now you might ask, what does that mean to you Allison? Gee,don't I wish I knew! I've been pondering it for a while. While I can't articulate the whole, I suddenly realized that expecting to find the unusual life walking the conventional path I am currently on is probably silly. The unusual is not likely to be found drinking lattes on a regular basis with the usual. Newsflash, Allison, helloooo!
I know 'not the usual path' covers a lot of territory. I've already deviated from it quite a bit if I compare it to, say, a two incomes with kids (Twinkies??) couple, living in a large planned community, going to soccer games, watching TV in the evening, church every Sunday, two cars, nice life. But, compared to the female equivalent of a spicy, colorful paella I lived with when I first moved to Austin, I'm cream of wheat.
She was South American, brilliantly creative, fascinating conversationalist, a modern day explorer (literally, climbing the Himalaya, sea kayaking in the South Pacific with her Australian boyfriend, a wildlife documentary maker) simultaneously sophisticated (her family of an old Argentinian line of writers and poets) and childlike (easily obsessed with clever, cheap toys, making up stories about her cat), talented software architect. She was probably the most interesting person I've ever known.
Well, that may be seductive but realistically it's probably a little more unusual than I have in mind. Besides, Maria seemed rather bi-polar. Which led to the other I wonder, the 99.99th percentile of unusual to the bi-polar or the other way 'round.....hmmm, best play it safe somewhere in the middle.....
OK, the unusual includes counting bright, creative people among my intimate acquaintances, giving play to my own bright, creative energies. Doing some things that could look pretty random to the casual observer, suddenly heading off in a a direction that grabs my attention. Not that that would seem too strange to those who have known me for a while :)
There is a difference though between now and how I've gone in new directions before....it seems more directed now. Before, it was, 'oh that looks so interesting, I'm going to check that out.' Kind of like a kid at the grocery checkout, just impulsively reaching because it's shiny or sweet.
Now, it's all wrapped up in finding some meaning for myself wearing a new skin. Bringing all my experience and wisdom to bear on something rather than thinking I have to accumulate more experience, more knowledge, more skills before I can do something important to me.
That feels profound to me. Accumulating more vs. directing my already more than sufficient resources and experience along unusual avenues.
Ooohh, instead of adding more clutter in my headspace, clearing out to the essential and beautiful.
Ha, I like that perspective!
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