It struck me yesterday, as I was having one of those rare mornings when the answer to a frustrating set of silly and unrelated incidents just seemed to be having a good cry (which I did....ah! that's so much better....), that even in the midst of my frustration and tears a part of me knew that this would go away and fade into the mists of time.
The sky would be its same lovely blue, again. The small, sublime beauties of life would still sneak up on me when I least expected it and leave me stunned with surpise and delight. The 10 year old girl in me would still take an unreasoning pleasure in using various colored and glittery-inked pens for writing everything from checks to journal entries.
It is definitely one of the perks of hitting one's 40s.
I noticed this beginning to happen several years ago. That even when I was in the depths of sadness , or presented with an upsetting situation or bad stretch of life happenings, there was a 'wise' part of me sitting on my shoulder, nodding knowingly and telling me that this would pass. "This kind of thing has happened before", my Wise One tells me. "Here you still are", she says, "having your share of happy times." "Remember how this works?" Oh yeah....I do remember, I think to myself.
It doesn't mean I don't have the occasional urge to just cry over the whole thing. Or life doesn't present more than its fair share of difficult times. But, I guess it's having lived through enough that you begin to see the patterns in things. So you see the ebb and flow of life more clearly. And you know that the pendulum always, eventually, swings back.
THANK GOODNESS!!
I think this awareness is what keeps the occasional 'yuck' time from spiralling into a much worse time. It keeps me more open to the possibilities embedded in those situations.
Even when I'm crying, I know that somewhere over the rainbow......
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